The Freshman 15
It’s fall and my oldest is heading off to college soon. He has been assigned his classes, has had contact with his new roommate and the move-in date is 10 days away. While I am positive many moms have experienced this, and all my feelings are certainly normal, this is one of the hardest seasons of life I have had in a while. I am experiencing all kinds of emotions, sometimes all at once! One minute I am so happy for him; happy he wants to leave home, has plans that are working out and I am happy he is excited. Then I am sad because I like him, I will miss him, and I worry he won’t call, and I will call too much. Then I am upset because I really liked being a mom of younger kids, I miss that season and worry I didn’t get all I could out of it. Then I panic because I only have 3 more years with my last child, and I see how fast that goes and I don’t feel ready for an empty nest! But ready or not, here it comes.
It is tempting when I feel things that make me uncomfortable to find a distraction –QUICK! Stare at my phone, grab a snack, start cleaning something, pick a fight with a loved one – ANYTHING but sit with the sad! But I also know that silence is good, processing emotions is essential for phycological well-being, and I need to feel all the feels as I try to remain grounded, in the moment, and sane for my loved ones. I know I may not feel like doing my normal workout routine in the coming weeks as I adjust to this new routine with one person less in my household. But I also do not want to confuse self-care with self- abandonment. While it is good to be flexible with your workout routine due to sickness, travel, holidays or that time of the month, be careful you do not shortchange yourself with these excuses. I have made a deal with myself: no matter how I feel, I am going to get into my workout clothes, turn on my tablet, and watch my favorite youtuber lift her weights (I am not a gym person. But if you are, get in the car and sit in their parking lot for the equivalent scenario). Chances are if I can get myself to THAT stage, I can go ahead and pick up the correct weight and lift – even if only halfheartedly. Even though it may not be my best workout, I can feel proud knowing I did something good for me even though I did not want to. I don’t believe in motivation, only discipline. If anyone around here is going to gain 15 pounds this first year of college, let it be my freshman!
